Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Artificial

Until last year we had a Christmas tree tradition. We would get a tree permit (an adventure of it's own) and then a couple weeks later go up into the Uintah's and cut down our Christmas tree with my family. We'd go sledding and tubing and hiking and hauling and finally Brian had enough. No more Charlie Brown Christmas trees for him!

So on Saturday night we set out on our Christmas tree quest. The girls were horrified when they realized we were not headed to a tree lot, but to a store. "A FAKE TREE!" they gasped. I was calmly reassuring, it's ok, the tree will look real and all the lights are already on it! Together we selected the perfect tree, a nine foot blue spruce with little pinecones on the tips.

The oh so professional "tree boys" assured us that it would be boxed and waiting for us up front in 20 minutes. We had dinner and then went to go make our purchase. Right in front of the register was a tree box with our last name in big letters. We handed the cashier our tag and they trucked the tree right out to the car.

After wrestling the tree box into the house we prepared to open and assemble. "This box looks new," I remarked to Brian. Because we had purchased the last remaining blue spruce (which was the floor model) I wasn't expecting a new box. We opened the box to find...someone else's tree.
"Did you tell them our last name?"
"No, did you?"
"Nope."

We loaded the wrong tree back in to the truck and Brian raced back to the store to get there before closing time. I made a frantic phone call to try and locate the right tree. After two phone calls and two people who obviously knew nothing the tree boy finally called back. "Yeah, we wondered where you went," he drawled. "We'll go ahead and get your tree ready up front," he added helpfully. I hung up and crossed my fingers hoping that the desire to leave the closing store would inspire him to actually get the tree up front this time.

So, we got the tree set up...and the lights didn't work on half of it. For the last three days Brian and I have tried everything, including unclipping the entire strand of lights, removing them from the tree and replacing every bulb. No luck. So today I removed all the strands of unlit lights and replaced them with new strands.

Tonight, I will go to bed with a lit and half decorated Christmas tree. Instead of a Charlie Brown Christmas tree adventure, we now have the National Lampoons Buy an Artificial Pre-Lit Christmas Tree and Have an Adventure. AUGH!

4 comments:

benrobb said...

That's what you get for buying a fake tree =)

Becki said...

I remember giving Mom a bunch of grief when she went and got our fake trees. I don't think we had quite the adventure you did though, you lucky ducks.

Noriane said...

Well one thing you won't miss is finding dead tree needles in your carpet in like, May! :)

Michelle Alley said...

Oh no! What an experience. I was an advid get a real tree gal for 32 years - until we moved to Califronia and realized that trees in LA cost upwards of a 100 dollars - we took that 100 and bought a fake tree and have been happy fake tree owners ever since - we also just bought this contraption that finds the bulbs that have burned out, have you heard of this? let me know I'll send the name your way if you need it! Take care!